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A lot is made about table talk and the potential advantages and disadvantages of employing it in a poker game. In this article I’ll take a look at the two schools of thought on table talk and how to use table talk, but first I’ll start with some of the specific dos and don’ts you should follow when you are chatting up fellow poker players.

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The Dos and Don’ts of Table Talk

  • Always speak up when a mistake is made

When you notice someone has put in an extra chip or accidentally shorted the pot; or when you see someone incorrectly pushed a pot it’s your duty to speak up and correct the mistake. Most card-rooms have a “cards speak” rule, so as long as someone tables their cards its fine to correct any misread hands by a player or the dealer.

  • Never berate another player

When a player gets lucky or makes some other terrible decision that costs you money, don’t criticize them or educate them as to what they did wrong. For one thing, it paints you as a bad loser, but it also can cause the fish to start playing better, especially against you.

  • Always chastise a player who is criticizing other players

By the same token it’s fine to come to the defense of another player and chastise someone who is “tapping the glass.” You don’t have to be confrontational about it, but you should let them know they are breaching poker etiquette; a simple “You play your cards your way and let him play his cards how he wants” is usually enough to get the point across.

  • Always reprimand players who are breaking poker rules

When another player is talking about a hand, or acting out of turn, or unwittingly breaking some other poker rule, it’s fine for you to calmly explain to them why what they are doing is wrong. If you don’t not only will they keep doing it, but others may start to join in, and before you know it you could be faced with a table full of poker anarchists.

  • Always speak up when a player is shooting an angle

If you see someone shooting an angle on another player, don’t be afraid to call them on it. Angle shooters are as bad as cheaters and need to be singled out and shamed in my opinion. Just realize that you may be getting yourself into a confrontation, so if that kind of thing tilts you, you may want to see if someone else will say anything first.

  • Never talk about a hand before it concludes

Make sure you never give players that are still involved in a hand any information they shouldn’t have, no matter how innocuous it may seem. Even something as minor as whispering to your neighbor when you would have flopped a straight flush can be picked-up on (after all what are you telling him, that you folded A2 off-suit on a 6-7-8 of Spades flop?) and help one opponent over another.

The Two Schools of Thought

The Statue

A statue is a player who says as little as possible and “generally” doesn’t make any unnecessary movements either. Their basic approach to the game is to give away as little information as possible by being repetitious.

For most poker players this is the right approach since it gives away very little information; of course you won’t be able to use table talk to gain information from your opponents if you take this approach, but that’s the trade-off Statues make.

When you are playing against a statue it’s best to just go with your initial reads from their betting patterns and play, since concentrating and focusing on them for visual reads is fruitless and likely to just be a waste of mental energy.

Being a statue is far easier than being a Chatterbox, but it does require practice; practice at making the same movements over and over, and a willingness to make an already boring game even more boring by never speaking.

Some general tells you might find on Statues are:

When a statue points out the action is on someone or tries to speed up the game in some other way you can be almost certain they are interested in the hand, i.e. they have a big hand. So if someone who hasn’t said a word all night suddenly says something (especially to speed up the game) you know they have a good hand.

Also, if a statue does respond to another player’s inquiries they are likely to be very comfortable with the situation, i.e. they have a good hand. So, for instance, if you ask a player who hasn’t said anything other than “hi” since sitting down four hours ago, if he has a good hand, and he responds at all, chances are he has a good hand since he would have to be extremely comfortable to answer you considering his standard operating procedure is to say nothing. Making his current action is very out of character.

The Chatterbox

The chatterbox is basically the opposite of a statue. Chatterboxes like to talk, and because they talk so much it makes them pretty much unreadable –unless they have a specific tell they are unaware of. When you are playing against a chatterbox it’s best to simply ignore any probing questions they may ask you, for the simple reason that they do it all the time, so they are usually really good at picking something up by your response.

Some general tells you might find on Chatterboxes are:

One particular quirk of chatterboxes is that they liked to think out loud. This may not help you in the current hand –as they tend to do this when they are closing the action—but it does give you a bit of insight into their thought processes for future hands.

Most players you encounter will likely be in between the two and might exhibit traits of both types depending on the situation. Some players never shut-up until they play a hand then you can’t get them to say two words.

Using Table Talk

Making use of table talk is one of the more difficult things to master as a poker player, and many players see their attempts at eliciting information from their opponents have the opposite effect, and they wind up giving away information about their own hand. Still, other times you’ll see players get a really solid read after asking a question of their opponents, even one as simple as “how many chips do you have left?”

Small Talk

One aspect of table talk that anyone can handle, and that can be very beneficial, is what I call “small talk.” When you engage in small talk in between hands you can find out a lot about your opponents; from where they come from to what books they’ve read. You’d be utterly amazed at some of the info players will divulge to you if they like you; I’ve had people tell me their exact hand, every hand, and/or the way they would have played another person’s hand and why.

Fishing

When you’re fishing for information it’s important to make sure your words cannot be used against you during the hand or in the future. The best way to do this is to not say anything, but if you think your powers of mental persuasion are up to the task make sure you’re not pinpointing your hand with your line of questioning. Sometimes it doesn’t hurt to lie through your teeth and then show something completely opposite to the table just to throw them off what you were fishing for. For instance, you might say “can you beat two-pair?” on a board with a four-card straight, and then show a total air-ball, or just call with the small-end of the straight.



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